The heart break of gun violence continues. Early in 2024, there were more mass shootings than days in the year. As I reflect on our society’s inability to deal effectively with these complex issues, I have a sense of hope that this problem could be significantly improved if we committed ourselves to reasonable solutions yet a sense of dread that no such movement occurs amongst those with the most influence. We have let the voices of reason be drowned out by folks that use the shield of unfettered “gun rights” to now allow weapons of war in the hands of anyone.
I had just finished the manuscript for my first book in 2012 (MY CHILDREN’S CHILDREN: RAISING YOUNG CITIZENS IN THE AGE OF COLUMBINE) when the Sandy Hook massacre occurred. I had just received a t-shirt from the Sandy Hook Promise when Uvalde occurred. This cycle seems perpetual.
While our work to reshape rational public policy regarding guns continues, I still take solace in the words of those willing to address the issues. Barack Obama, in his remarks at the Sandy Hook Interfaith Prayer Vigil back in 2012, is a voice of such reason.1 Below I present snippets from his address and my thoughts.
- Here in Newtown, I come to offer the love and prayers of a nation. I am very mindful that mere words cannot match the depths of your sorrow, nor can they heal your wounded hearts. I can only hope it helps for you to know that you’re not alone in your grief; that our world too has been torn apart; that all across this land of ours, we have wept with you, we’ve pulled our children tight. And you must know that whatever measure of comfort we can provide, we will provide; whatever portion of sadness that we can share with you to ease this heavy load, we will gladly bear it. Newtown — you are not alone.
- President Obama understood the gravity of the situation and chose to recognize it head on. The deaths of the 20 children and 6 adults could not be dismissed.
- As these difficult days have unfolded, you’ve also inspired us with stories of strength and resolve and sacrifice. We know that when danger arrived in the halls of Sandy Hook Elementary, the school’s staff did not flinch, they did not hesitate. Dawn Hochsprung and Mary Sherlach, Vicki Soto, Lauren Rousseau, Rachel Davino and Anne Marie Murphy — they responded as we all hope we might respond in such terrifying circumstances — with courage and with love, giving their lives to protect the children in their care.
- Yes, these teachers did what they could to protect the children. Even in the face of evil, they saw their higher calling.
- As a community, you’ve inspired us, Newtown. In the face of indescribable violence, in the face of unconscionable evil, you’ve looked out for each other, and you’ve cared for one another, and you’ve loved one another. This is how Newtown will be remembered. And with time, and God’s grace, that love will see you through.
- As a humble listener the night of this event, I openly cried as I heard these words and thought about the love even under such circumstances. Indeed, time and grace will see us through…but only with the support and care of others.
- But we, as a nation, we are left with some hard questions. Someone once described the joy and anxiety of parenthood as the equivalent of having your heart outside of your body all the time, walking around…And every parent knows there is nothing we will not do to shield our children from harm…And we learn that our most important job is to give them what they need to become self-reliant and capable and resilient, ready to face the world without fear.
- But are we really, as a nation, committed to protecting our children? Gun violence is now the number one reason for death in childhood, and no significant measures have been taken to safeguard them. Whose rights are being infringed when our children die from unprovoked gun violence?
- This is our first task — caring for our children. It’s our first job. If we don’t get that right, we don’t get anything right. That’s how, as a society, we will be judged.
- For example, children learn from adults and in a society that is now allowing open carry of guns in many quarters, we are sending the absolutely wrong message. Guns have no place out in the open.
- There’s only one thing we can be sure of, and that is the love that we have — for our children, for our families, for each other…It comes as a shock at a certain point where you realize, no matter how much you love these kids, you can’t do it by yourself. That this job of keeping our children safe, and teaching them well, is something we can only do together, with the help of friends and neighbors, the help of a community, and the help of a nation. And in that way, we come to realize that we bear a responsibility for every child because we’re counting on everybody else to help look after ours; that we’re all parents; that they’re all our children.
- When we don’t see all children as our own children, we enter into the us vs. them paradigm. We don’t really care to shield the other children, just our own.2
- “Let the little children come to me,” Jesus said, “and do not hinder them – for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” Charlotte..Daniel…Olivia…Josephine…Ana…Dylan…Madeleine…Catherine…Chase…Jesse…James…Grace…Emilie…Jack…Noah…Caroline…Jessica…Benjamin…Avielle…Allison. God has called them all home. For those of us who remain, let us find the strength to carry on, and make our country worthy of their memory.
President Obama’s introductory remarks at the Prayer Vigil are shown below. I have chosen to quote them to conclude this essay.
To all the families, first responders, to the community of Newtown, clergy, guests — Scripture tells us: “…do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away…inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands.”
AMEN.
- Saul R. My Children’s Children: Raising Young Citizens in the Age of Columbine. CreateSpace; 2013. 225 pp. (Obama’s comments in the Final Remarks section)
- https://mychildrenschildren.com/communal-parenting/