Dr. Bob: My grandson seems to have fits of crying that are difficult for any of us to control. I remember his mother having colic, but this seems so much worse. What can his mother do? How can I help her?
Answer: Indeed, you seem to be describing colic. We don’t really know what causes colic. It is often described as intense crying (seemingly inconsolable) starting in the first month of life and usually subsiding by 3 months of age. As the parent of a child with colic and the medical provider for thousands of children with colic, I understand the anguish that parents go through with dealing with colic. It is terrifying to see your child in such apparent pain at a time when parents have an increased workload (taking care of a newborn) and increased emotional strain (taking care of a newborn and adapting to the changes in their relationship). It is hard! Let’s discuss several key points.
- Since we don’t have a good explanation for colic most of the time, reassurance is key. Parents are not doing anything wrong or causing it. Up to 20% of infants can have colic.
- At the same time, it is important that children with colic be examined in early infancy to be sure that no identifiable cause can be found. A history and physical examination by the baby’s physician are crucial to assess for such problems. We do not want to miss an intestinal or other physical condition that might explain the crying or fussiness.
- Colicky crying tends to follow a pattern. Often the onset is late afternoon or early evening. It can last up to 3 hours, and this will certainly cause any new parent to be anxious.
- It does get better with time before it dissipates around three months of age. It usually is not related to a certain formula, and in my experience, changing formulas is a futile venture. Yet most families want to try and change formulas. I have discouraged this because often the colic returns within 24-48 hours after the formula change.
- Parents need help and support to deal with colic. First-time parents are particularly vulnerable to stress. When continuous crying occurs, that stress is only accentuated. Grandparents, aunts and uncles, other family members or close friends can help by providing some relief (doing some chores around the house, letting the parents get a nap or some other source of support) and supporting the emotional needs of the parents. It is easy for those of us that have lived with colic to simply tell new parents that it will go away. Simple reassurance can be seen as less than adequate if there is no help. New parents should ask for help when they need it.
- Some soothing measures for the baby can include burping the baby, walking around with the child, going for a stroll, going on a car ride, or placing a hand or pillow under the stomach while walking around.
The baby’s physician should be relied upon as much as needed. They are there to assess, recommend interventions and provide ongoing support. They can be that calm, soothing influence to settle the nerves of the parents and the grandparents. When the dust settles after several months, all parties will be relieved and ready for the next challenges in parenting.
Dr. Saul is Professor of Pediatrics (Emeritus) at Prisma Health and his website is www.mychildrenschildren.com. Contact Dr. Bob at askdrbobsaul@gmail.com with more questions.