Dr. Bob: My infant daughter is having problems getting to sleep. We have “survived” colic (she grew out of it) but now she sleeps with me. Is that ok? Somebody told me that I shouldn’t do that, but I need to get my sleep.
Answer: Your question highlights multiple issues about infant sleeping. I can understand your dilemma about comforting your infant and the need for your own sleep, especially if your infant had colic and now it is subsiding. But there are several very important things to be emphasized.
- It is not safe for infants to sleep with adults. I have seen several tragic outcomes where parents have inadvertently suffocated their infant during sleep. There really are no safeguards to avoid this. It might seem safe, and you might feel confident that you would never have a bad outcome. But please do not take that chance. Your infant needs to sleep in her own crib.
- Your daughter should sleep on her back. The risk of sudden infant death has plummeted since the recommendations for infants to sleep on their backs has been released. In my career, this has been one of the most dramatic preventive measures that I have seen. Please, make sure that she sleeps on her back.
- Make sure that there is nothing other than the mattress with a sheet in the crib. There should not be any pillows, blankets, toys or stuffed animals. These items have caused suffocation and should not be used.
Now let me address your concern about your sleeping. You are right to be concerned about your own health. You must stay healthy to care for your children and for own well-being. While you might think that co-sleeping will be the solution to a problem, it will create a more difficult problem to correct in the months ahead. It is very important to think through what options you might have available. Can I place the crib next to my bed for the short-term? Can the parents take turns being with the fussy infant? A few difficult nights are certainly worth avoiding the risk of infant death.
Dr. Bob: My 4-year-old daughter has started sleepwalking. This really scares us. What can I do to protect her?
Answer: Sleepwalking (also called somnambulism) is a real concern for parents. The problem implies that sleep is disordered and needs attention. Please meet with your pediatrician and explain the circumstances of her sleepwalking and look at possible ways to protect her. Some of those ways include
- using puppy gates at the door of the bedroom. Sometimes you actually need two since she could crawl over one gate.
- using puppy gates to make sure that she does not try to go downstairs while asleep.
- making sure that the doors are adequately locked and that she cannot go outside. I once had a patient that the parents found outside at night.
There are pediatric sleep specialists that can help with this problem. Their job is to try to understand why this is occurring. They will often do sleep studies (just like older adults have to detect sleep apnea). These studies can help sort out the causes. These specialists can also suggest ways to deal with the sleepwalking. I only saw a few cases in my career, but I understand why parents are so worried about sleepwalking. Get it checked out.
Dr. Saul is Professor of Pediatrics (Emeritus) at Prisma Health and his website is www.mychildrenschildren.com. Contact Dr. Bob at askdrbobsaul@gmail.com with more questions.